1. COMMIT YOURSELF TO GOD’S STANDARD’S

Sexual purity begins with a decision to be pure - with a choice to be obedient to God’s standards even though it will be difficult. How can you do this?

• Learn what God’s Word says about purity
• Establish some ground rules for your relationships
• Decide how far is too far NOW and never cross the line

If you date someone and things go well how far will you go? God calls you to refrain from all forms of sexual intimacy until marriage. You need to decide what those lines are for you. I think some good principles to follow are this:

• Would I be doing do this openly around other Christians?
• Is this going to end up tempting me to go too far?
• Could this potentially tempt my date to go too far?
• Would God be pleased with this?

To that end here are a few things to consider prolonged sessions of kissing, petting, and partial or total nudity, immodest dress, sexually explicit conversation, letters, e-mails, text messages, even viewing sexually suggestive forms of media and entertainment

2. MAGNIFY THE CONSEQUENCES OF NOT WAITING AND THE BENEFITS OF WAITING.

When you’re faced with temptation a great tool to help you overcome the temptation is to magnify the potential consequences of that sin. For example, if you’re tempted to have pre-marital sex that would be a good time to remind yourself that there’s a 25% or better chance that you will contract a STD including HIV. That would be a good time to remind yourself that after a few minutes of pleasure you could be a mommy or daddy for the rest of your life. It would be a good time to ask yourself, “How would I feel if my spouse walked in on this?”

3. FIND A MATURE CHRISTIAN ADULT YOU CAN CONFIDE IN.

“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Prov. 27:17 (NIV)

There is no underestimating the value of a mature Christian friend that you can turn to for help, counsel, and even correction. They can help you be more balanced and objective in how you handle romantic relationships. But the key words are “mature Christian adult!” No unbelievers in this role, no immature Christians in this role, no teenagers in this role. You need a mature Christian adult!

4. NO MISSIONARY DATING

“Stop forming inappropriate relationships with unbelievers. Can right and wrong be partners? Can light have anything in common with darkness?” 2 Cor. 6:14 (GWT)

If you’re single decide up front who you are willing to date and who you are not willing to date. In other words, prayerfully establish some basic standards for you dating relationships. Create a profile of a person you would date.

Believers with believers only - there is no dating unbelievers here. Avoid the deception to "missionary date" with the hope of converting unbelievers because while you wait on them to come to Christ, which they may never do, you can get emotionally, and even too-often physically, entangled. I personally think you should go even further here.

5. KNOW YOURSELF AND BE TRUE TO YOURSELF

This is simple. No one knows you better than you. You know what gets you into trouble in relationships. You know what kind of people are bad for you - but you tend to be drawn to them anyway. You know what kind of places are bad for you - but you tend to be drawn to them anyway. You know what kind of activities are bad for you - but you tend to be drawn to them. Follow your conscience and avoid those people, places, and activities.

6. SERVE GOD AND LET HIM FIND YOUR MATE

“So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.” Genesis 2:20-22 (NIV)

It was while Adam was going about his work for God that God brought him a mate. For a Christian, prior to entering the covenantal relationship of marriage with another person you are in fact already in a covenantal relationship with God.

In fact, the Apostle Paul celebrates the fact that single people have certain advantages over married people when it comes to God. They can and should devote themselves more so to serving God. No one should be doing more in the church, in the Kingdom of God than single people. You should be the most aggressive servants of God in terms of time devoted directly to building the Kingdom.

7. DEVOTE YOURSELF TO GROWING IN CHRIST

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.” Ephesians 6:10-11 (NIV)

• Pray daily for God’s wisdom, strength, protection and blessing
• Immerse yourself in your relationship with God - stay close to Him

8. GUARD YOUR MIND

“Be careful how you think, your life is shaped by your thoughts.” Prov. 4:23 (NCV)

God says, “Guard your mind.” Why? Because not every thought you have is a good thought. And even thoughts that in themselves may not be “evil” or “bad” can lead us into temptation. So God says, “Pay attention to your thoughts and learn how to shut the door of your mind to garbage.” The same way you would secure your home at night to prevent unwanted guests you need to secure your mind to prevent unwanted thoughts from leading down the path of sin. Here’s a few ways you can do that?

• Memorize large portions of Scripture - “Your word I have hidden in my heart, That I might not sin against You!” Psalm 119:11 (NIV)
• Actively think about good - “Turn your back on lustful thoughts and give your positive attention to goodness, integrity, love, and peace.” 2 Tim. 2:22 (Ph)
• Avoid situations that stir up the wrong desires - “Flee from sexual immorality.” 1 Cor. 6:18 (NIV)