Is sex outside of marriage wrong? The short answer is, “Yes - it’s wrong.” Some scriptural support for that would be...

“Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry. But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband... Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.” 1 Cor. 7:1-2, 8-9 (NIV)

“It is God’s will... that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable.” 1 Thes. 4:3-4 (NIV)

The phrase sexual immorality deals with all kinds of sexual activity inside and outside the marriage relationship including all sorts of deviant sexual behavior. It would include pornography, prostitution, adultery, and even premarital sex or se with someone you're not married to. In other words, these passages help us understand that sexual immorality is sin and God wants us to avoid it.

FIVE REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD COMPLY WITH GOD’S COMMAND TO AVOID SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE

1. GOD LOVES YOU AND ONLY HAS YOUR BEST INTERESTS AT HEART

“The Lord your God would not listen to Balaam but turned the curse into a blessing for you, because the Lord your God loves you.” Deut 23:5 (NIV)

God loves you and only asks of you what will ultimately be best for you in the end. It doesn’t mean it’s the easiest or most pleasant path, but it always the most eternally rewarding path.

“However, the person who continues to study God's perfect teachings that make people free and who remains committed to them will be blessed. People like that don't merely listen and forget; they actually do what God's teachings say.” James 1:25 (GWT)

God’s word is a treasure map. When you study it and do it consistently you keep stumbling into good things. You keep tripping over blessing. It’s not an accident. It’s because God loves you so much that he gave you his Son, his Spirit, and he gave you his word to lead you into the best, most rewarding life possible. God rewards obedience.

2. SEX IS A GIFT TO BE ENJOYED WITHIN MARRIAGE

"Sex is good, it is God's gift... and this good gift of God will find its fullest expression realized when a man and a woman give themselves completely to each other in the marriage relationship.” - Daniel Akin, God on Sex

There is a very popular term in our culture today related to sex. It’s the phrase casual sex. Nowhere in the Bible can you find any reference or credibility given to the idea of casual sex. The reason is because from God’s perspective there is nothing casual about sex. Sex is sex - and it has very real consequences for the parties involved. In the context of marriage those consequences are typically blessings. But outside the context of marriage those consequences are costly, life long, and potentially disastrous. Sexually transmitted diseases, unexpected pregnancy, and psychological and spiritual scars are just a few of those potential consequences.

When you recognize that sex is a gift from God, who was the creator of it - doesn’t it make sense to follow God’s instructions about sex? Who knows best how something works? Wouldn’t it be the creator?

When you open a new gift that requires assembly. What do you do? Do you just start trying to put it together or do you read the instructions? All the men are saying, “I never read the instructions. Instructions are for wimps. I just figure it out as I go.” And that’s why we have so many problems with sex. We never read the instructions. The creator gave sex for the pleasure and enjoyment of a man and a woman in the context of marriage. If you use it that way you get the most out of it. If you don’t use it that way it’s like trying to hammer a nail with an iPod. You won’t drive the nail and you’ll wreck the iPod in the process.

Yeah, but isn’t sexual desire natural? Yes it is, but that doesn't mean that every way of satisfying that desire is appropriate or even good for you. Hunger is natural, but eating too much or the wrong things can make you or sick or even kill you. Thirst is natural but would you want to drink polluted water. No. why? Because it could make you sick.

“God wants you to be pure and to keep clear of all sexual sin... For God has not called us to be dirty-minded and full of lust but to be holy and clean.” 1 Thes. 4:3,7 (LB)

God doesn’t want us drinking dirty water when it comes to sex and sexual desire. The proper way to deal with our natural desires is either satisfy them in the context of marriage or overcome them in Christ.

3. GOD’S INSTRUCTS US TO BE HOLY AND AVOID SEXUAL IMMORALITY

“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified and that you should avoid sexual immorality and that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable.” 1 Thes. 4:3-4 (NIV)

The third reason why we should avoid sexual immorality is simply because God said so. The Bible forbids all sex outside marriage.

Limiting your sexual disobedience to a one person doesn't turn it into something that’s acceptable in God’s eyes. Limiting sexual disobedience to someone you “love” or have deep feelings for doesn’t make it acceptable in God’s eyes. You’re not “making love” - you’re having sex. If it was real love it would wait until it could be expressed and experienced within marriage.

“Never offer any part of your body to sin's power. No part of your body should ever be used to do any ungodly thing. Instead, offer yourselves to God as people who have come back from death and are now alive. Offer all the parts of your body to God. Use them to do everything that God approves of.” Romans 6:12-13 (GWT)

4. PREMARITAL SEX DAMAGES INTIMACY AND COMMITMENT IN MARRIAGE

Commitment is the foundation of a marriage - not sex. Build a marriage on anything other than commitment expressed in love and it will fail - and there are many kinds of failure. Commitment creates the proper environment for trust, which leads to intimacy. Without real commitment there cannot be real trust - and without real trust there will not be real intimacy.

Let me ask you a question. Would you feel more comfortable telling a very personal, and intimate detail about yourself to -- a friend who has proven over the years to be trustworthy and able to maintain confidentiality, or would you tell it to a friend who has a big mouth? You would tell the friend who is trusted to keep it confidential, not the big mouth. Why - because trust allows you to feel confident about being intimate. Trust breeds intimacy. You can only be intimate with someone to the extent you trust them.

“Unmarried commitment” is a contradiction in terms; the proper term for a committed sexual relationship is “marriage.” Without it, what would you be committed to? Committed to sex? Here's how you know you have a commitment. When you're married, you have one, and when you're not married, you don't. Before the marriage ceremony, everything is reversible — your thoughts, your feelings, even your intention to get married.

5. THERE ARE VERY REAL LIFE LONG PHYSICAL CONSEQUENCES TO SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE

• Unplanned pregnancy - Eighty percent of teens that become pregnant drop out of school. And 60% of them get pregnant again with 2 years. We’re told that teen pregnancies account for some 30% of US abortions.
• A less than ideal marriage
• Sexually Transmitted Disease (STD's)

Approximately one in four sexually active teens is living with a sexually transmitted disease (Dr. Meg Meeker in Epidemic: How Teen Sex Is Killing Our Kids Lifeline Press, 2002).

Nine million Americans are carrying a sexually transmitted disease. And at that rate of growth it will be one out of every four people in about five years.

Why is that happening? Because of sex outside of the marriage relationship.

A teenager has sex with that person they think is the "one" - only to a few weeks later they now have an STD they have to carry the rest of their lives - and may someday have to explain to their potential future spouse - assuming the disease isn’t fatal. An unfaithful husband or wife has a one nightstand and then infects their spouse with HIV. The chances of infection may be around 25%, but if you’re infected, you’re 100 percent infected.

Sex outside of marriage is sexual immorality. And sexual immorality is sin. Can you avoid it - yes. Should you avoid it yes!

“You are not your own; you were bought with a price. Therefore honor God with your body.” 1 Cor. 6:19-20